Transformerid: Langenute kättemaks

[Taavi]

Käisin ka seda vaatamas ja see on tõesti nii kehv kui sellest räägitakse. Korralik ulmelugu jääb selgelt tahaplaanile. Muud häirivad detailid rikuvad kogu filmi ära.
Seda on siin juba eelnevalt räägitud, aga kordan ka üle, et operaatoritöö on lausa kohutav. Kujutage ette mis tunne on kinos vaadata languvarjuhüpet kui kaamera teeb hüppaja ümber kiireid ringe. Või kui suured ja väga suured robotid kaklevad ja sa näed ekraanil vaid rusikaid ja imelikke näoilmeid (mis on siin robotite puhul tõesti olemas). Või kui plahvatusest näed vaid leeke ja mingeid arusaamatuid tükke silme eest läbi lendamas.

Läbi kogu filmi on headel alati aega nalja teha. Ning isegi kõige ohtlikemates olukordades inimesed lihtsalt vaatavad kuidas transformerid kaklevad ja kui kõik inimeste pooldajad on langenud, hakatakse alles peitu jooksma. Vahepeal kujuneb see nii ajuvabaks, et lausa piinlik hakkab nende pärast. Filmi lõpp kisub selles mõttes eriti ära.

Kõiksugu plahvatusi ja muid effekte on filmis muidugi ohtralt, kuid midagi muud seal vaadata kahjuks pole.

[Forzelius]

[quote="Taavi"][/quote]

wwwwhoooaaaaa

[Ralf]

No vaat, Forza, sellised jutud sundisidki mind otsustama selle filmi pileti peale mitte 70 krooni raiskama. Kosmosesse vast lähen.

[Forzelius]

tegelt whooaa oli selle peale, et taavi tegi häält üle kahe ja poole aasta.

[Hülss]

Ilge fucking käkerdis tõesti ja käisin veel kinos vaatamas. Läksime lambist sõbraga kinno ja see oli esimene seanns mis hakkas, seega võtsime Transformers 2'e.

Arvustust pole blogisse veel pannud, aga laksasin siia üles ja päris head juttu sai mõnega aetud selle filmi teemal.

Kõige parem kommentaar...

Originally Posted by cryptodan View Post

Yeah some people just dont appreciate the classics when they are hit with them. Supernaughts review is rather immature and naive. He obvioulsy doesn't have the taste in going to see a movie just to see it for sentimental value.

I am sure his other reviews in other languages are down right just as pitiful as this one. This one is full of naive complaints and ignorant use of offending / not offending rhetoric. He just shouldn't have gone to see the movie.

I loved this movie, and I would recommend it to anyone who loved the Transformers cartoon during the early 80's for shear sentimental value. The destrobots were done really well, and Devastator OMG they put a lot of work into that transformer, and his transformation. It was very well done, and adhered to the cartoon very well, but then again those of us who remember the cartoon would have remembered that.

A 5/10 rating by Supernaught should be taken with a fine grain of salt. His reviews are baseless and very ignorant.

I rate this movie a 9.5/10 I gave .5 off due to a few scenes that should have been removed, but all in all don't listen to the OP he wouldn't know a good movie it came out of the TV/Theater and slapped him upside the head and said "Hello, I am a good movie, and you are a jarate poor reviewer." Have a good day.

[Hülss]

Ma ei tea kas seda olete lugenud, aga naera või herneks.

SPOILEREID TÄIS!

Are there honestly 46 new Transformers in the movie?

I have no ****ing clue. It's impossible to tell most of them apart except for Optimus and the Racist Twins (there's another yellow Autobot who I constantly thought was Bumblebee). There could be 46, or there could be 12. I honestly would believe 12 if someone had said that.

What is the status of the Transformers at the beginning of the film?

The Autobots have joined the military to hunt down the Decepticons. We're told the Decepticons are "doing things," but they appear to be hiding peacefully when the Autobots show up and brutally murder them.

What?

Yeah. The Decepticons aren't apparently doing anything, then the Autobots show up, the Decepticons run for their ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ lives, and the Autobots hunt them down and brutally murder them. It's kind of weird.

Why is the U.S. military helping them?

Supposedly to help keep the Transformers a secret from the public. Although since the climax of the last film was a massive firefight involving 50-foot robots and took place over five miles of downtown Los Angeles and the beginning of this film wrecks several miles of Shanghai, China, they seem to be incredibly ****ty at their job.

How does the U.S. military help them?

Well, not at all, actually. They just kind of come along with guns and stuff, and act like they're going to help, but the Autobots do all the work.

Why is the U.S. military in this movie at all, then?

Because Michael Bay has a huge fetish for jets and tanks and aircraft carriers and considers giant robots only a necessary evil for the film. At least 15 full minutes of the film's 150-minute run time is nothing but footage of jets and tanks and planes without any robots or actual action whatsoever.

How is Sam Witwicky dragged back into the fight?

Well, he finds a fragment of the Allspark shard. You know, the Allspark that he spent all last movie being told he shouldn't give to Megatron, but when he gave it to Megatron, it killed Megatron. That one. Anyways, the shard makes the Beef see symbols and act like more of an spaz than usual.

So the Decepticons want the shard? Why?

Uh... to bring Megatron back to life?

What?

That's what they said.

But the Allspark killed Megatron in the first movie.

Yes.

...and now it can also bring him back to life.

It's very powerful, this Allspark.

Uh-huh. So what's their plan to get it?

They send a small R/C car who talks like Joe Pesci in Casino to get it.

Shouldn't they have sent Starscream or somebody?

Look, there's another Allspark shard and get that one anyways, so it doesn't matter.

Well, then why do they give a **** about Sam?

The symbols. In his head. That the shard of the Allspark gave him.

They weren't in the other shard?

Apparently not.

So how do the Decepticons plan to get the symbols, I guess?

Well, the Decepticons have very cunningly created a hot chick robot who they enrolled in the same college and put in the same astronomy class as Sam. And they made her a huge ♥♥♥♥.

Wait.

Waiting.

There's a ♥♥♥♥ty Decepticon?

Yeah, she's a real ho. The Decepticons apparently have an incredibly powerful ♥♥♥♥-making program, because she has it down, man. Anyways--

Didn't Sam touch the shard and get the symbols stuck in his head on his first day of college?

Yes.

So the Decepticons made a ♥♥♥♥ty robot to attend his college and enrolled her in classes and put her in on-campus housing just in case Sam ended up being important at some point in the future?

Apparently. It was an elaborate plan, but it sure paid off.

How so?

Well, not at all. The ♥♥♥♥-bot made out with him for a little bit then immediately tried to kill him, neither for any apparent motive or gain.

It sounds preposterous.

Doesn't matter, because the Decepticons use the shard piece they do have to resurrect Megatron! He's back! Ooo! Scary!

Why is this scary? All he wanted was the Allspark, and now it's gone.

...because he has a boss! He's called the Fallen, because he's so evil! He has an evil plan to use a machine on Earth to blow up the sun and make energon! Or something! It's not very clear.

Now you're just making **** up as you go along, aren't you?

Best not to think too much about it. Anyways, the symbols in the Beef's head are a map to where this machine exists, so the hunt is on and Sam shortly is captured by otherDecepticons in one of the many instances where Bumblebee inexplicably abandons the Beef so he can conveniently be in trouble.
Then a robot called the Doctor who speaks gibberish with a German accent shoves things up Shia's nose and gets the symbols.

That's that, then, right? The Decepticons win?

No! Because Optimus Prime saves Sam before they cut off his head, which has another treasure inside!

Really? What is that?

No one really bothers to explain this, actually. Suffice to say, the Decepticons continue to want Sam. Oh, then Optimus Prime fights three Decepticons at once and dies.

Where the hell were the other Autobots during this fight?

I don't know. They were with him before the fight, but then they disappear and show up right after he dies. But they appear sad about Optimus dying. Marginally. I mean, they don't get any screen time or dialogue to convey any feelings or anything, but there's some sad music playing for a little bit afterwards. I assume this means the robots that are off-screen are grieving.

Well, if one shard brought Megatron back to life, can't Sam just use his shard piece to resurrect Optimus?

Yes. He could.

...
...Well?

He doesn't.

Why not?

I'm not sure exactly.

Then what the hell does he do?

He decides get those symbols that were in his head translated to figure out what the Fallen's up to.

Which Autobot does the translating?

Err... none of them. Actually, it's John Turturro.

What. The ****.

Yeah, since he was laid off from his super-secret government agent job, he now works in a NY deli and runs a super-popular Transformers conspiracy theory website. Like ya do.

And why couldn't an Autobot translate these symbols?

Because Bumblebee is mute and the Racist Twins are poor black robots from the slums of Cybertron who never learned how to read. It's a sad commentary on Cybertronian society. Like The Wire, actually.

Where the hell are the other Autobots?

I don't know. Away. They seem to be unable to be reached. They're probably grieving about Optimus still. Clearly, John Turturro is the reasonable solution here.

So Turturro translates the symbols.

No, that would be silly. He does, in an incredibly bizarre series of connect-the-dots, lead them to Jetfire, an elderly and deceased Transformers whose corpse is hanging out in the Air & Space Museum.

What good is he dead?!

Ah! Remember the shard? Sam uses it to bring Jetfire back to life!

Not Optimus?

No! This way, Sam can get the symbols translated... so he can, er... find the ancient machine... that can, uh... possibly bring Optimus back to life.

You have to ****ing be kidding me.

Moving on! Jetfire teleports everyone to Egypt, including some of the missing Autobots --

Wait, what? Teleports?

Yes, teleports.

Transformers don't teleport.

Jetfire does.

But -- wait a second, he's a ****ing jet. He could fly everybody to Egypt, right? And that would make perfect sense for both the character and the franchise!

Well, I guess so. But he chooses not to. The point is Jetfire teleports them all to Egypt where he explains that there used to be 7 or 8 Primes, and they traveled around the galaxy blowing up suns for energon. But they never did it on planets with life. Well, they had set the machine up on Earth and not noticed all the life running around, and one of the Primes just said **** it, let's do it anyways. This was evil, so they called that Prime the Fallen and beat the **** out of him although he escaped.

Okay...

So that other mysterious reason that the Decepticons wanted Sam's brain? It's because it contains some very vague clues about the Matrix of Leacdership, which is the device that turns on the sun-exploding machine. The Fallen needs the Matrix to blow up the sun and get his Energon.

Hold on. That's what the Matrix of Leadership does in the movie?

Yes. Works the sun-exploding machine.

I'm fuzzy on how "Leadership" covers that.

I didn't name it. But it does sound a little nicer than "Matrix of Blowing Up the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Sun." If I may continue, in order to protect the Earth, the 6-7 other Prime hid the Matrix on Earth and made a tomb with their own bodies. Isn't that cool?

...
...

No. No it is not. If they wanted to protect Earth, why did they leave the Matrix on the planet? They're a space-faring race, they could have hid it anywhere in galaxy! Second of all, what the **** does making a tomb of their own bodies do? Shouldn't they have stayed alive to protect the Matrix? Or finish off the Fallen? Or just not die and leave Earth and the entire Transformer race in jeopardy?

Uh...

And why hide the Matrix at all? Don't they need Energon to survive? Didn't they say they go to other lifeless planets? These idiot Primes just doomed their whole species for no ****ing reason whatsoever! No wonder the Decepticons are so jarateed.

...ahem. Eventually, Sam and crew find the Matrix, which instantly crumbles into dust. Sam puts the dust in a sock because he thinks it will bring Optimus back to life.

Grr.

What follows is the most spectacular part of the movie, as Sam and Mikaela try to run the several miles back to the military camp during a massive Decepticon attack where the military has dropped Optimus Prime's corpse.

Why is that awesome? They could drive back in one of the Autobots and be there in a minute or two.

They don't do that.

What?

They walk.

Of course they do. And I assume the Autobots just mysteriously disappear again until a second before a Decepticon is about to kill Sam.

Yes. Exactly.

I am already incredibly sick of this movie, and I'm just typing questions about it. Sam resurrects Optimus, Optimus kills the Fallen, end of story, right?

Pretty close. Sam dies, though.

Really?

Yeah, for a little while. But then the Transformers in heaven send him back because he still has work to do.

**** you.

I'm serious.

**** you. There's no way.

It's true. The 6-7 Primes are there in the clouds like Mufasa's head in The Lion King, and tell Sam he's awesome and he needs to live again so he can bring Optimus back to life.

I may be ill.

Then Jetfire appears out of nowhere and rips out his own heart right in front of Optimus to give him his elderly old robot powers. This makes Optimus into a flying badass who defeats the Megatron and Starscream and the Fallen in a little less than two minutes. After the last 30 minutes of the movie have been nothing but explosions -- not all of which have any obvious causes -- it's a bit disappointing.

Anything else you want to add?

Well, only that although Sam jams the Matrix of Leadership into Optimus Prime's chest to resurrect him, a Decepticon takes it out like 10 seconds later and Optimus is fine. Just a little weird, is all.

Can you give me any reason I would want to see this film in theaters?

I can't answer every question, man.

[eerik]

Seth Rogen arvab nii.

[rauls]

Seth Rogen arvab nii.

Eelkõige jäi meelde selline kirjeldus filmi kohta, mis tuli Rogeni suust:

biggest fucking shit I've ever seen

Eks ta nii kipub vist olema.

[Ralf]

Selle kriteeriumi järgi pole ju filmil väga vigagi, et kui lähed tualetti ja junn on suur siis on ju mõnusam tunne... väike reverse psychology ühesõnaga.

[rauls]

Selle kriteeriumi järgi pole ju filmil väga vigagi, et kui lähed tualetti ja junn on suur siis on ju mõnusam tunne... väike reverse psychology ühesõnaga.

Hea tõlgendus sul . Kaitsed filmi v?

[Ralf]

Selle kriteeriumi järgi pole ju filmil väga vigagi, et kui lähed tualetti ja junn on suur siis on ju mõnusam tunne... väike reverse psychology ühesõnaga.

Hea tõlgendus sul . Kaitsed filmi v?

Tunnistan üles, mulle täitsa meeldis küll. Naljakas on see, et paljud on siin teemas nurisenud, et lolli huumorit ja värki oli liiga palju, aga minu arust oli seda esimese filmiga võrreldes sootuks vähem, ja isegi kui mitte siis istusid antud filmi naljad mulle rohkem. Eks see koerakutsikate dominatiivne panemine ja Devastatori gondelmunad panid küll silmi pööritama, aga seda tegid ka näiteks esimese jao Bumblebee oma kusemisega - kuigi see oli tegelikult küllaltki terane hetk, sest alles varem oli Sam'i koer talle endale peale kusenud ja Sam ütles Bee'le siis, et ta üritab vaid armastust välja näidata või midagi (sain sellest alles hiljuti IMDb tahvleid lugedes aru). Kokkuvõttes kõik mis mulle esimese puhul ei meeldinud oli siin mõnevõrra parem.

Egiptuse peatüki käigus vajus silm paar korda kinni, kolmandat vaatust venitati küll meeletult. Aga ei, action oli kõva ja ega ma meistriteost oodanudki vaid lihtsalt mõnusat popkornikat. Bay on muidugi paras tühikargaja.

[LiveForThis]

6/10
Meeldis vaadata küll, aga tohutult nõrgem kui eelmine. Meelt sai lahutatud nii et vähe ei ole, aga Bay arvab endast liiga palju. Kogu see labane huumor ja lollivõitu tegelased rikkusid filmi ära.

[Spellbound]

6/10

[Trash]

Ma tegelikult tahaks teada, mida Trash filmist arvas?

Aga palun, lõpuks jõudsin ka mina kinno.

Transformers 2 : Revenge of the Fallen

[Nowitzki]

Esimene osa meeldis palju rohkem.
Natuke liiga pikk oli,vahepeal muutus päris tyytuks ja tuli tahtmine edasi kerida aga muidu k6ige hullem ei olnudki.